Is sex still a big deal amongst teenagers?
By Vera Chidi-Maha
Sex is the world’s number one product, making it is the biggest and most profitable business. Everywhere one turns, it stares unblinking. Adverts are daily tailored in the way that messages are laced with sexual innuendoes to attract attention and patronage of the advertiser’s products.
Films, clothes, music and books – all celebrate the mystery and power of sex. Women are often portrayed as sex objects to be used and dumped at will. No musical video is complete without a skimpily dressed girls flaunting, to the delight of men, their feminine attributes. The Makos revolution perhaps underscored this fact more than ever.
Films with vivid sex scenes are aired these days without care that young minds may be present. Sex on the internet is as cheap and common as the air we breathe, so also are pornographic books and films. The result is the world that revels sex, especially teenagers who see it as a source of excitement. In the last couple of decades the African society, which treated the subject of sex as something sacred, has found itself grappling with the consequences of over exposure to sex. It has so permeated most societies that the subject has lost its aura of secrecy. It has evolved from being an adult thing to a child’s toy. Teenagers no longer see it has a big deal after all, the new technologies have elevated it to an open thing.
Unlike in the past when teenagers projected an angelic mien to disguise their premature knowledge of the subject, the teenagers of today have neglected such finesse. So blatant are they of their new found knowledge and the power that comes with it, that they tell anybody who cares to know in words or action what they know. Ironically, many parents, especially some mothers , pretend not to notice that their children have become sex addicts. While appreciating the fact that teenage years are usually traumatic for both children and parents, the truth reminds that today’s youths need assistance and support if the country’s tomorrow is to be safe – guarded. One of such ways is for parents to take advantage of the amount of information on sex by telling their children, especially the girls, about the fact of life. Assigning the role to another person is not the best. It is the joint responsibility of both parents to educate their children on sexuality. It is high time parents appreciated the fact that whether they acknowledge it or not, powerful chemicals called harmonies are causing havocs in the bodies of this young minds that makes them stray into the adult world.
No amount of pretence alter these facts. Many youths, out of ignorance and curiosity, have become premature adults because they lack information on what sex is all about. The consequence of this on the girls is more devastating as she becomes the exhibitor of the action of two ill – prepared persons. She not only jeopardize her chances of getting proper education but also calls to question the integrity of her parents particularly her mother who is then perceived by the society as a failure.
Studies have shown that most of these girls not only get pregnant on first attempt but go into it out of curiosity because of the image of something dirty and forbidden which parents wrap the subject of sex in, whereas, the generality of the society portray’s it on the ultimate in enjoyment.
Most mothers who are too shy to discuss sex as a natural concomitant of adulthood, paid the picture of dirt around it, a thing only indecent and depraved people do. Yet the children know better, they are fully aware that they are product of this supposedly dirty act. This is certainly a paradox difficult to reconcile. It should be appreciated that methods that worked for kids of yester – years will certainly not work for today’s kids who come from the moment they open their eyes in the maternity wards, come complete with hi – tech information on sex.
The best way to beat them at their game is to acknowledge their knowledge of the game. But being friends with them and earning their trust maybe panacea to the problem because they will tell you what they know and listen to your advice.